3250 N Downer Ave Unit 1

Apologies for the lackluster apartment ads lately. We've reached Stan's B-side album of irreverent listings. Even I recognize they no longer make sense. I have one where a Sumerian frog sings about how he lost his dream apartment to locusts from UW La Crosse. It's actually quite enthralling; I'm in talks with Netflix and Guillermo del Toro. Instead of despairing over my droll ads, you should worry about finding a place for next year because we're circling the drain. At this rate, you'll be competing against well-qualified chipmunks to rent a tree outside Sandburg. It’s surprising how, on paper, a chipmunk makes a better tenant than most college students. Fret not, I've one more awesome four bedroom. I adore the living room’s beautifully textured plaster walls, arched doorways and grand fireplace. On top of these timeless Tudor features, we completely remodeled the kitchen and, if you’ll let me, will add a second bathroom. You’ll also enjoy in-unit laundry and garage parking. And you’ll have a ridiculous location on Downer across from campus. If UWM was a clown college, which it is not despite what those awful UW La Crosse folks say, you could launch yourself out a cannon to class. K, GTG, Guillermo calling. Drop me a line for a tour or if you speak Sumerian and look adorable in a frog costume.